Hi guys. It’s Peri. This will be brief. Yes I am coming out of the fog, but still hazy. First, yahoo I am home. I LOVE being with my family. I am in bed quite a bit, but not asleep. This means I can help with homework, read books, play Candy Land, UNO, and make believe with figurines. Plus the kids bring a new picture or note of inspiration about 3x a day each! I am soaking up the love and pouring it back out, which leaves me feeling stronger and more alive each day.
I must put in a plug right here of eternal gratitude to the folks who have helped me through this ordeal. Family and friends alike have driven from out of town to provide full time child care, showing love to the children as if they were their own. Others have sent/brought delicious food, keeping all hungry mouths fed. Folks came and spent the night with me in the hospital, when I was weak, scared and confused. I am overcome with gratitude for the blessings we have received here recently, and those we have received all along my cancer journey. And I want to highlight my husband Gordon, who day by day continues to amaze me. He is truly a Godly man, a great husband, father and friend. He works very hard to provide for us, and makes time to engage and ensure that the children’s school and sports/recreation needs are met. Then there is me, who now is another “dependent.” He loves me so, and takes care of me with care and nurturing. He is my best friend, and despite all, we still enjoy one another and have time for some grueling Yahtzee matches . What an amazing gift I have in Gordon.
For some time now I have been reading and studying information re alternative, more holistic approaches to treating my cancer. I have discovered many things and read a lot of personal testimonies reporting full healing, or at least improved health and diminished cancer. I believe there is a lot out there. I have prayed and contemplated much, wondering what I should do. I could add a lot of weight to my decision regarding treatment as a life or death matter. What if I make the “wrong” choice. It could negatively impact me, and my loved ones. Gratefully I know better. None of us can predict the future and if I prayerfully and intentionally make my decision asking for God’s help and guidance, this is the best I can do. So I did.
Today I went to the doctor. As you can well imagine, I made a list of questions. I fully trust my doctor and feel that we have a very good relationship. He tells me his truth and experience, but also listens to me and takes my feelings into full consideration. He treats me like a member of the team and I really value this. So today I decided to continue with chemotherapy.
In the hospital I received two treatments. Starting next week, Thursday, I will begin again. I will get tx 1x a week for three weeks (as long as my blood counts remain stable). Then one week off, then 3 more treatments. Then we will scan to note any changes (hopefully shrinkage). I feel confident that I will tolerate the chemo, as I have in the past and that the outcomes will be positive. This is my hope and prayer.
In the meantime, Gordon and I have been seeking and interviewing nannies so we can secure full time childcare without depleting the energy of our friends and family. We have spoken with some hopefuls and plan to make a decision in the next few weeks.
Gordon and I will add some pics this weekend.
Much love to all. Thank you SO MUCH for your posts. I really love hearing from you.